How to Embrace the Lone Wolf Lifestyle and Chart Your OWN Course

brown wolf
Photo by Steve on

It doesn’t matter who you are or where you come from, if there is one piece of advice I could provide to everyone, it would be this one: follow your own path.

Take your own route, for god’s sake.

Do not follow in the footsteps of another person. Just because you feel emotionally beholden to your parents does not give you permission to follow the route they planned out for you.

Do not wander down a road that seems to be yours but is really the artificial ideal of who you ‘should’ be that society has constructed for you.

Do not follow a road just because you have found yourself on it or because you believe it to be “good enough.”

Do not go down a road that makes you feel as if you are being forced into servitude just because the prevalent sociocultural norms dictate that this is what you “ought to be” doing.

Take the road less traveled. That requires MAKING a very deliberate decision about the course of your OWN life. This is an act of spiritual independence that I have chosen to take.

Who or What Exactly is a Lone Wolf?

A person (or animal) who chooses to be alone over being part of a group is generally referred to as a “lone wolf.” This definition applies to both humans and animals.

On the other hand, this article uses the term “lone wolf” to refer to a person who has followed their calling and abandoned their previous life, which has resulted in them being isolated from other people or living on their own. We all have a wild side that longs for freedom, the truth, and genuine expression, and it’s called our inner wolf.

If we want to live a life that has significance, if we want to fulfill our destiny and our spiritual purpose, then it is our responsibility to pay attention to the wolf that resides within us and to accept the precious wildness that we all possess.

The Reason Why the Majority of People Are Afraid to Walk Their Own Path

There is a good reason why the majority of individuals choose to go in the same direction as the crowd, despite the fact that going your own way could at first seem like a highly powerful option.

The First Reason Being:

To begin, choosing your own route means you run the risk of being turned away by other people. You run the risk of becoming the subject of rumors, of being thought of in derogatory terms (such as a “kook,” “oddball,” or “idiot”), and of being completely ostracized or separated from other people.

There are times when the people who are closest to you are the ones who reject you. And what could possibly hurt more than losing a member of your own family, a close friend, or even a partner?

We as a species are physiologically predisposed to seek approval since acceptance is directly correlated with continued existence.

The mere thought of doing anything that may result in our being rejected is enough to send off those ancient, primitive warning bells and for the hair on the back of our necks to stand on end.

I would even go so far as to say that choosing your own path assures that at some time in your life, someone will look down on you and ask, “What on earth are you doing, you imbecile?”

The second reason is because

The fact that it requires an incredible amount of effort is the second primary reason why most individuals steer clear of blazing their own trails. Nobody will provide you with a map, a set of rules, or instructions that will tell you what to do out there in the world. YOU are the one who has to take responsibility for finding out everything from begin.

It’s like trying to find your way around in the dark while avoiding all of the pointy items in the room. You will make errors.

You are going to crumple to the ground and crash squarely on your face. When you do something entirely out of the ordinary, you are going to experience a wide range of unsettling feelings, including embarrassment, overwhelm, and many more.

And most individuals are aware of it on both a cerebral and an emotional level. The majority of individuals have at least a passing familiarity with the implications, yet they nonetheless choose to live lives that are cozier, more comfortable, and more blandly average than what is recommended by society.

A third reason is that

The third reason why the vast majority of individuals avoid following their own pathways is because it involves “too much” responsibility.

When you decide to walk your own path, it is YOU who is accountable for what happens next. There is no one to point the finger at, complain about, feel victimized by, or blame for the situation.

You are the employee, the employer, the pioneer, and the creative all rolled into one. You are in control of everything, as opposed to someone else being in charge of everything, and it is ultimately your responsibility if you end up feeling unhappy with what you have accomplished. The majority of individuals are unable to deal with it.

The majority of individuals like the cozy confines of their cages because it gives them the impression that their feelings of being “poor little” victims of life are legitimate.

It is much simpler to place blame on someone else, rather than accepting responsibility for one’s own actions, and to have a sense of empowerment as a result of one’s self-righteousness.

The fourth reason is because

The majority of individuals tend to avoid following their own pathways for a number of reasons, the most common of which being the fact that they are unsure of where to begin. To begin, there are those people who aren’t even aware that there is another option.

It seems that we are brought up in cultures that teach us that there is a finite number of routes, sometimes known as the routes that are taught by the large companies that profit from education at the university and college levels.

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At a young age, we are socialized to think that obtaining a degree from a four-year college or university is the only way to build a job that can be considered “satisfying” and that achieving success in one’s chosen field will always lead to happiness.

The majority of us don’t even learn about alternate routes that might be just as satisfying, if not more so. In the majority of situations, spirituality is not even mentioned at all.

Therefore, when we do come onto the prospect of following a new route that goes against the grain, not only are we terrified by it, but we are also invalidated by the fact that our social conditioning has led us to believe that we cannot do so.

A lot of people have the misconception that the only way to know you’re walking a “proper” or valuable path is if you get the approval of social institutions (or, shall I say, social marketplaces) in the form of degrees and PhDs.

This is because many people believe that the only way to know you’re walking a “proper” or valuable path is if you walk it.

Our capacity to take action is paralyzed by the profound mistrust that we are conditioned to acquire in ourselves. The majority of us never do anything worthwhile with our aspirations; instead, we let them rot in the recesses of our brains.

Walking in your own direction may have some strange and wonderful benefits. Here are 13 of them:

The only aspect of going your own way and being a lone wolf that we have discussed so far is its potential drawbacks. But what about the perks that are so jaw-dropping, exhilarating, and blood-tinglingly good?

When the potential benefits and drawbacks are weighed against one another, the potential drawbacks fade in contrast to the potential benefits that you might anticipate experiencing.

Yes, being unique and following your own road as a lone wolf may be awkward, tiresome, perplexing, and isolating at times; nevertheless, there are so many benefits to be gained from this bold style of life that it is more than worth it in the long run. Here are several examples:

1.) You are free to go down the road that your spirit knows is right for you.

2.) You will invent and create to the fullest extent that your heart could ever want.

3.) You’ll make connections with folks who provide genuine encouragement and sustenance for you (your soul family)

4.) You’ll experience immense mental, emotional, and spiritual development

5.) You will eventually develop into the person you were always meant to be.

6.) You will have a significant impact on the lives of others around you.

7.) You feel more ALIVE

8.) Feelings of thankfulness, enthusiasm, and pleasure come more naturally.

9.) You will find that many unexpected doors will open for you.

10.) You feel more energetic and energized

11.) You have earned a healthy dose of respect for yourself by bravely pursuing the goals that you have set for your life.

12.) You will get the opportunity to experience the excitement of venturing into uncharted terrain.

13.) You are able to experience joy and fulfillment even as you drift off to sleep at night.

Does choosing your own path always imply that you would have to accept being a loner or an outcast in social situations? Not usually by any means.

It’s possible that your true calling in life is to work in an office inputting numbers into a computer database. Perhaps it’s as simple as being an upstanding citizen in your community. (If you feel empowered by it or believe it’s for a bigger reason, all the power to you! ), “all the power to you!”

However, I would argue that there is a distinction between defensive complacency (for example, saying something along the lines of “I don’t know what you’re talking about, but I’m perfectly happy in my path/job, thank you very much”) and genuine contentment.

Awakening of the Spirit and Going It Alone go Hand in Hand

On a spiritual level, we will all, at some point in our lives, be forced to go alone down the path of the lone wolf. Those who have experienced a spiritual awakening or a “dark night of the soul” are fully aware of how true this statement really is.

After the blinders have been removed from our eyes, it is physically impossible to continue complying to the standards and norms that are upheld by society. The traditional methods are doomed to fail in the long run. There is a price that must be paid.

Consequently, why is it that traveling the route of the lone wolf is an essential component of the journey toward spiritual awakening? The explanation is that in order to get started on the spiritual road in the first place, we have to break away from what is comfortable for us.

We are forced to go alone. We have no choice but to embark on a journey into the Great Unknown. (If you are acquainted with the ‘Hero’s Journey’ book written by mythologist Joseph Campbell or the Fool card in the Tarot, you will understand this.)

But what really sets off this first waking and the need to go out on one’s own?

There comes a time in each of our lives when we take stock of everything and everyone in our immediate environment and conclude that “there has to be more.”

We’re no longer satisfied. It seems as if life has no meaning. WE are left with a void. This need for something that is more profound and important than the quest of financial goods is what leads us first along the road of the lone wolf.

What Does It Mean When People Refer to It as “The Road of the Lone Wolf”? 

The reason I refer to it as the lone wolf road is because, at least in the beginning, it is often a very solitary journey. To successfully navigate the route, WE are the only ones who can successfully reacquaint ourselves with our own inner bravery, discernment, and wild internal compass; NO ONE ELSE can accomplish this job for ourselves.

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And if we don’t cultivate the inner fortitude, resiliency, and intellect that are shown by the wolf, we run the risk of quickly relapsing into the life of the soulless and sometimes destructive existence that the billions of sheep out there lead.

How to Embrace the Lone Wolf Lifestyle and Chart Your OWN Course

On some level, walking your own path needs you to make a deliberate decision in which you affirm, “Yes, this feels true to me, and it’s what my Soul genuinely wants for.” Walking a real road will always need some degree of self-awareness, and this is true even if you were to stumble across that path by mistake.

You are going to have to accept the fact that you are a lone wolf at some point throughout your trip through life. You’ll have to tackle this challenge on your own.

You are going to have to go against the grain, break loose from the herd, ask the tough questions, and face the confronting facts, which may cause you to become estranged from other people.

You will need to be discriminating, see through the BS, brush off the haters, and keep pushing ahead even if you are exhausted from battling, even if you are weary of fighting.

Being a lone wolf is synonymous with having the mindset of a fighter. It implies having the guts to step into the unknown while simultaneously standing up for what you believe in.

It was all worth it in the end. I can guarantee that to you, and I will continue to do so until I am blue in the face, but in the end, you are the only one who can figure this out for yourself. Don’t consider anything I say as fact until you’ve verified it via your own firsthand experience.

Embracing your inner wolf, embarking on a spiritual journey, and boldly taking your own path all need a certain amount of bravery; if you feel this pull, the following are some helpful pointers:

1. Recognize and come to terms with the fact that there will be some blowback.

There will always be those who disagree with you, whether they come from your circle of friends and family or from society as a whole. You will, at some point, come into contact with pessimists, people who try to dampen other people’s enthusiasm, and sourpusses who want to pull you down to their level.

They oppose you because, in their eyes, you cast doubt on the validity of their way of life. This is the reason why they battle against you. They will be forced to contemplate their own life and the choices they have made because you have the guts to forge your own path.

They will experience a feeling of bitterness, which is something they will transfer onto you, if they have understood, on some level, that they have followed the pack and have not made any choices that are distinctively their own.

Realize that the problem is with them and not with you, even if it’s not pleasant to be on the receiving end of something like this.

You are most definitely not the only one dealing with this issue, since everyone who walks a route with a heart will, at some time, suffer social uneasiness; you are not the only one. Just keep going on and keep reminding yourself that the only person who has the right to tell you how your life should be lived is you. No one else has that right.

2. Pose the question to yourself, “What do I really, fundamentally want?”

This is not a question that you ask just once; rather, it is a question that you ask over and over again as you go down your journey, maybe thousands of times.

Keep redirecting your attention to the things that you want on the most fundamental level, and not the things that other people wish to project or dump upon you.

What is it that you sense God is calling you to do? What are some goals that you have for your life that you would want to achieve? Which dangerous roads are you reluctant to go because they are so foreign, despite the fact that you are secretly pulled towards them?

Our ways are not set in stone; rather, they are dynamic, ever-evolving, and subject to modification. You will be able to reimagine yourself in many different ways if you keep asking yourself this question over and over again. You will be in touch with your Soul, which will prevent you from being mired in an outdated and uninspired way of existence.

3. Put everything up for debate.

A keen intellect is synonymous with traits such as being a lone wolf and traveling one’s own path. If we are unable to exercise discernment, how are we supposed to know the difference between our “things” and that of other people’s? If we lack the capacity to evaluate, it will be very difficult for us to discern what information can be trusted and what can be disregarded.

Your mind is a tool, and like any tool, it can always be better. Without a clear head, it is easy to give in to illusion and naiveté, as well as to make mistakes that lead one down rabbit holes that result in a lot of confusion.

You run the risk of easily falling victim to emotional and spiritual predators in the world if you lack the capacity to think critically and maintain a balanced perspective by keeping an open heart.

Your capacity for discernment will serve as your sword of protection as you go down your journey. I just cannot place enough emphasis on how critical it is to exercise discretion! Do not give somebody the power to persuade you of anything until you have tried it out for yourself first.

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4. Have affection for oneself and act as your own closest confidante.

When you choose to follow the wolf’s way and take responsibility for your life, you may find that you are on your own. If you are your own greatest adversary, then the road ahead of you will be one million times more difficult.

However, if you can direct part of that energy into discovering how to love and accept yourself exactly as you are right now—flaws and all—then the road ahead will be a million times less difficult for you.

You are the one person who has been by your side through everything, and you are the only person who is with you around the clock. doesn’t it make sense to enjoy who you are?

Doesn’t it make perfect sense to look forward to the time you spend by yourself? From what I’ve seen, the answer is a resounding yes. Self-compassion is one of the most effective tools you can have, and knowing how to love yourself is one of the most powerful qualities you can have. Ever.

5. Be aware of who you are.

Make it your goal each and every day to get a deeper understanding of who you are, including both your capabilities and your limitations. “Discovering oneself and having a deep comprehension of oneself are very significant aspects of traveling one’s own route.” He who knows others is knowledgeable.

He who knows himself is enlightened,” was a quote attributed to the ancient Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu. When you have come to a profound understanding of who you are, only then will you be able to confidently accept who you are and go on along your path.

6. Acknowledge that you are afraid, but go nevertheless.

If you choose to follow in the footsteps of the lone wolf, you will always find yourself in precarious and troubling circumstances. Even taking the first step on the way might be a daunting experience.

Many people have the misconception that following your passion and being attentive to your vocation will lead to a life filled with sunshine and flowers. In many cases, it means making significant sacrifices and having the mental fortitude to stare danger in the face without running away.

Despite the fact that I am not a perfect example, I have learnt that it is a healthy option to experience dread but to act regardless of those feelings (in most cases). It seems to reason that if you are in a predicament that might endanger your life, you should definitely take a breather and then flee in the other direction.

However, if the fear you’re experiencing is of an emotional or psychological kind, be kind to yourself and keep moving ahead anyway. Keep your end objective in mind at all times; remind yourself that you are deserving and that you have the strength to go on, and keep moving forward.

It is important not to give in to anybody or anything that can attempt to pull you down. And if you do end up falling, don’t give up; just keep getting yourself back up and trying again. Just keep in mind that you can do everything you set your mind to. Have the bravery to expose your vulnerabilities.

7. Let your wild nature lead you.

Recognize that you have human and heavenly qualities in equal measure. Embrace the crazy and irrational side of yourself that acts as your internal compass, and do it with confidence.

Pay attention to the emotions in the pit of your stomach, and allow your animal self to become consumed with ardor. You are freed from the obligation to be subdued or restrained in any way.

The moment you decide to go your own way and accept the lone-wolf aspect of your personality, you will experience true freedom.

You are free to experience the sensation of the wind blowing through your hair, the sun warming your face, and the ground under your feet. You are the creator of your own life. Your future depends on the decisions you make now.

Make sure you go out of your head and into your body—into your blood, your heart, and your bones—what are they trying to tell you? Recognize and value the insight contained inside your natural instincts.

Recognize and give due respect to the untamed and unrefined emotion that is inside. Take use of this enthusiasm and allow it to direct and inspire you.

There is no purpose in continuing down a road in which you have no interest or enthusiasm. Allow the wild and uninhibited howling of the wolf that is inside you.

Keep in mind that YOU are the path in addition to being the traveler on the journey. Always look within to get the bearings you need to navigate your course.

Be wary of trying to find it in other places outside yourself. Even if other people may be able to shed some light on your path, in the end, the most important light that will guide you is your own soul.

What are your thoughts on doing it alone and following the route of the lone wolf? What kinds of challenges have you had to overcome, and how exactly have you done so, if at all?

How did it feel to go against the grain of society and choose your own path instead of following the crowd? I’d love to read your comment.

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